My Ideal Bookshelf (?)

November 28th, 2012

My Ideal Bookshelf (?)

My Ideal Bookshelf (?)

There’s a new book out called My Ideal Bookshelf, which I read about at Mental Multivitamin, then promptly put on my amazon wish list. She posted her Ideal Shelf, here is a stab at mine–hey, it goes to 11!

Possession
by A.S. Byatt
Life with Jeeves by P.G. Wodehouse
Middlemarch by George Eliot
The Illustrated Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte, ill. Dame Darcy
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare
Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace
Hamlet, The Tempest and Twelfth Night by Shakespeare
The Holy Bible NRSV

Also, please note, I picked particular Shakespeare plays rather than a collection. More challenging, no?

Wuthering Heights and A Wrinkle in Time almost made the cut. I think I’m missing a good, cathartic weepie. Probably should have put Anne of Green Gables on there, in lieu of Witch of Blackbird Pond.

What does your shelf look like/contain? You can print out an illustration at the Ideal Bookshelf site, too.

Talking Television

November 28th, 2012

As I’ve gotten older and free time has gotten scarcer, I don’t obsess about new and returning fall television as I once did. That said, I still watch plenty of TV, and we haven’t talked TV in a while. Here’s what’s on the rotation currently, and why:

The Mindy Show: not hilarious, but charming and funny enough to keep going with
Happy Endings: bizarre and often hilarious
Arrow: comic-book geek guilty pleasure, heavier on the guilt
Nashville: soapy, woman-centered guilty pleasure, heavier on the pleasure
Modern Family: for now. Feeling very been-there, done-that.
Parks and Rec: Love this funny, sweet show. From season 3 on, this has been a consistent entertainment.
30 Rock: last season, and they’re pushing some interesting boundaries.

We tried Elementary (another woman-violent procedural), Last Resort (didn’t see the hype) and Ben and Kate (almost cute enough but not quite.), all just once.

Currently watching past seasons of Downton Abbey, Homeland, Friday Night Lights.

Looking forward to return of Breaking Bad and Mad Men.

I read all of Alan Sepinwalls reviews of my shows at Hitfix. He’s got a smart, informed commenting base, unlike Entertainment Weekly’s, which is regularly horrible and hateful.

What are you watching that’s worthwhile?

DVD & Movie Bender

November 26th, 2012

Long weekend plus stitches in my leg from having a non-melanoma but atypical mole removed meant permission to sit on my a$$ the long Thanksgiving weekend. Woo hoo! Here’s what we watched.

Friday Night Lights Season 2. I’m glad people warned me that this season is silly and to persevere. Otherwise, I wouldn’t, because it’s as if the writers threw ever cliche at the screen they could think of: murder! drug dealers! love triangle! Also, they ended season 2 with a surprise pregnancy, as they did season 1. Keeping the faith that Seasons 3 to 5 are as good as people say.

Harry Potter 3: Prisoner of Azkaban. With the kids for family movie night. The day after, my husband G. Grod and I were in the kitchen discussing whether we should buy the whole series of movies, or just borrow from the library. I said I didn’t care for them that much and was leaning to the latter when 9yo Drake said, “Hello? I’m standing right here! I LIKE them.” And we now have the entire set on Blu ray. I do like film 3 better than the previous 2, it’s darker and the kids are growing up.

Planes Trains and Automobiles. John Hughes’ first movie for grownups. Thought we might watch it with the kids, but was glad we didn’t, give the eff-ing scene in the middle. But a good one for Thanksgiving.

Our Idiot Brother. Carolyn said she liked it, and she was right. This was dumb but entertaining and sweet like its main character.

The Amazing Spider Man. Again, with the kids. I just love Andrew Garfield as Peter Parker, and Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy.

Skyfall. G. Grod and I saw Goldeneye on our second date, in 1995. We’ve been going to see Bond movies for 17 years. This was entertaining, though overlong and doesn’t at all hold up under even light consideration.

And, to finish out the weekend, we watched the pilot of Homeland, since everyone gushes about it. I was immediately sucked in. Can’t wait to tear through it.

Wound Care for the New Millennium

November 26th, 2012

Remember the advice we got growing up on how to take care of cuts–. dab some antibiotic ointment on it, bandage loosely, then leave it open to the air and let it alone to form a scab? Nope. This actually increases scarring.

For big cuts, like the set of stitches I got last week when I had a non-melanoma mole removed, here’s the modern protocol to heal faster and prevent scarring, which was news to me:

1. Keep the wound covered with a bandage until it heals. Change the bandage daily. You can let water or soapy water run over it, but don’t aggressively clean it.
2. When replacing the bandage, do cover the wound with a thin film of something like Aquaphor or Vaseline, to keep in moisture. Don’t use antibiotic ointments like Bacitracin and Neosporin. These can cause rashes and reactions. Avoid Target-brand bandages–they all contain antibiotic ointment.
3. Get the least adhesive bandage that will cover the wound and stay in place for a day. Tough and waterproof strips will irritate surrounding skin quickly. Paper tape to hold gauze in place sticks less well, but is far less irritating.
4. Avoid fish oil supplements. They’ve been shown to slow down healing.

And, for the record, this is a reminder that tanning beds, which I used often when I was young, are bad for you. Stop pretending they’re not. Real sun, in moderation and with sunscreen, if at all. The end.

“The Silver Linings Playbook” by Matthew Quick

November 24th, 2012

The Silver Linings Playbook
The Silver Lining Playbook by Matthew Quick has been on my shelf for years, a gift from my Eagles-fanatic stepfather-in-law to my Eagles-fanatic husband when it was released, and pulled off the shelf by me because it’s currently playing on the big screen.

Quick’s novel is eminently readable, an entry in the emotionally-stunted-young-man-stumbles-toward-some-kind-of-understanding genre. In this it strongly reminded me of Jonathan Tropper’s This is Where I Leave You.

Pat is a guy in his 30’s, just released from a mental institution, and he’s pining for his wife Nikki, that everyone else, including the reader knows, is his ex-wife. He’s got an emotionally stunted dad whose moods are dependent on whether the Eagles win or lose. (I’m married to an Eagles fan, so I really appreciated the ethnography of this particular subculture as I recognized many aspects.) Pat thinks life plays out like a movie, where every bad thing always has a silver lining, so much of the book reads like the film it’s been “adapted” into, rife with coincidence, but still has some surprises. Alas, one of the reveals near the end about Tiffany, the emotionally damaged woman Pat has befriends, continues to nag at me. Two aspects of it read like really creepy male-fantasy masquerading as characterization, and this left it ending on a sour note for me.

“August Moon” GN by Diana Thung

November 24th, 2012

August Moon by Diana Thung
August Moon by Diana Thung is a children’s graphic novel heavily influenced by Hayao Miyazaki’s films in general and My Neighbor Totoro in particular, though it’s rather like Princess Mononoke crossed with the latter, as there are bad guys with guns. There’s also a little bit of Seuss’ The Lorax.

It’s cute and sweet and has likeable child protagonists in Jaden and Fi, but I found it hard to read visually at times. For example, there would be multiple panels of a character facing different directions when they were only supposed to be moving in one direction–this was disorienting. My difficulty could also be a factor of many small panels per page. My 9yo son Drake read this and really enjoyed it. He has much sharper eyes than I do.

“36 Arguments for the Existence of God: A Work of Fiction: by Rebecca Newberger Goldstein

November 24th, 2012

36 Arguments for the Existence of God by Rebecca Goldstein
Just so we’re clear, Rebecca Newberger Goldstein’s book 36 Arguments for the Existence of God is a work of fiction. And yet, it’s kinda not. As they say, it’s complicated. Or, as my professor of Judaism in grad school used to say in the type of grad-school lingo often parodied it Goldstein’s book, “it’s not UNcomplicated.” Thus, whether you like it or not (and my book group found it pretty divisive), you probably won’t find it UNinteresting.

Goldstein has a background in philosophy and mathematics, and was raised as an Orthodox Jew. All these aspects and more are woven through the novel. She has written both fiction and non-fiction, and her philosophy colleagues tend to view her fiction forays with suspicion, as she notes in this weird book trailer where her husband, the cognitive psychologist Steve Pinker, talks with her about it, yet never identifies her as his spouse. It also features a lot of stilted shots of Goldstein on a ladder in their impressive library. As I said, weird.

It’s a 400+ page novel with a 60-page appendix that contains the 36 arguments of the title. I found the appendix and the parts of the book that were very philosophically argumentative less interesting, and the morality tale of the characters involving and fascinating.

Some readers in my book group reacted negatively to the esoteric verbiage of the overtly philosophical sections. As one noted jokingly, it made her feel “stoopid.” Others reacted to how lengthy these sections were, and noted they tended to drag, especially as compared to the novel, featuring a religion professor named Cass Seltzer.

In that weird book trailer, Goldstein coyly claims that it’s a misconception that characters are based in reality. And yet, there are a lot of ringers in her books generally. Compare this photo of the author’s ex-husband, mathematician Sheldon (”Shelly”) Goldstein:

Sheldon Goldstein and this description:

handsome, but not in a way to make the squeamish consider indeterminate sexual orientention, Cass has a fundamental niceness written all over him. He’s got a strong jaw, a high ovoid forehead from this his floppy auburn hair is only just slightly receding, and the sweetest more earnest smile this side of Oral Roberts University. (11)

Some reviews have noted likenesses between characters and real people, most especially Jonas Elijah Klapper as Harold Bloom, but there’s also likeness between Sy Auerbach and literary agent John Brockman, and another minor character interested in immortality (can’t remember the link.)

There’s also more than a passing resemblance between Goldstein herself and Cass’ girlfriend, Lucinda Mandelbaum, the “goddess of game theory”: who is described as grey-eyed, beautiful, graceful and more throughout. One of the many things I found interesting in this was that if Goldstein is going to write herself into the novel, why do it as an unlikeable Mary Sue? (I wondered, could this book be like an apology to her first husband, a la Hemingway’s Moveable Feast, where Lucinda is young and mean to the sensitive guy?)

I’ve gone on here, and haven’t even gotten to main parts of the story and other characters. It’s an interesting satire of academia, and of new atheists. It fictionally presents the question whether there’s any point in trying to prove the existence of God.

My advice on reading, if you think this sounds interesting: read the novel, then the appendix, and skim the parts that you find slow, since the narrative wanders and does not have consistent momentum. And yet, I do recommend it. It made me think, and still has me thinking.

Holiday Baking

November 19th, 2012

I have had a crazy-town banana-pants week, with all three book groups meeting and four articles to turn in. Thus, no posts last week. I am emerging from under my rock, though.

One of the articles is up at Simple Good and Tasty, on L.C. Finn’s flavor extracts, which I used to make Pumpkin Spice Muffins and Anise Biscotti.

img_2870

I will use this excuse to repost the easiest Pumpkin Pie recipe which I will be making tomorrow:

Impossible Pumpkin Pie–no crust needed!

1 15-oz. can pumpkin
1 1/2 c. milk, or 1 13-oz. can evaporated milk
1/2 c. biscuit/pancake mix or 1/2 c. flour plus 3/4 tsp. baking powder
1 c. sugar
2 Tbl. butter, melted then cooled
2 large eggs, beaten
1 tsp. cinnamon or 1/2 tsp. cinnamon extract
1 tsp. ground ginger or 1/2 tsp. ginger extract
1/4 tsp. ground cardamom, or 1/8 tsp. cardamom extract
1/2 tsp. salt

Preheat oven to 350F. Grease a 9-inch glass or Pyrex pie plate.

Place all ingredients in blender; blend for 2 minutes. Pour mixture into pie plate and bake for about an hour, or till center is set and tester comes out clean. Cool. Serve with vanilla or ginger or cinnamon or cardamom or maple whipped cream.

Wanderlust (2012)

November 12th, 2012

I may have to stop listening to Entertainment Weekly reviews; they gave Wanderlust an A-, and I thought it was reaching for a B-. I thought this would be a short, funny diversion. While I did laugh at some parts, I’m having trouble remembering what they were the morning after. (Unlike 21 Jump Street, where I saw a gas tanker yesterday and my husband and I started laughing over a joke from that movie.) What sticks instead are the excruciating overdone dick-centric, homophobic scenes with Ken Marino, and the awful Paul Rudd in a mirror scene followed by the insult-to-injury Paul Rudd with Malin Ackerman scene.

I found 21 Jump Street (also IMO overpraised at EW) and Wanderlust uneven, but where 21JS had boring and silly bits, Wanderlust had actively unfunny/offensive bits that largely obscured the funny parts for me.

Also, I have now had it with penis humor. Grow up already.

“21 Jump Street” (2012)

November 11th, 2012

Uneven, silly, but 21 Jump Street made me laugh. A perfectly fine free viewing experience, courtesy of the public library.

“The Thousand Autumns of Jacob de Zoet” by David Mitchell

November 10th, 2012

The Thousand Autumns of Jacob de Zoet by David Mitchell. Made me laugh. Made me cry. Had me utterly involved over the course of reading it. Didn’t want to leave the world and these characters. A smashing historical novel. Perhaps one of the best books I’ve ever read.

Oh, I’m sorry, did you want a little more than that? All right, all right.

The book opens, not on the main character, but with a midwife attending a complicated birth. Then, in 1799 by the Western calendar, a young Dutch clerk named Jacob de Zoet goes to Dejima, the trade outpost of the Dutch on the coast of Japan. He’s there along with his patron to uncover just how corrupt the former Dutch representatives were. After a chance meeting with a woman over a monkey that’s absconded with a severed human foot, things get really complicated. And that’s just in section one, before things go really crazy in section two. This book has history, trade, Japan, interpreters, romance, evil kidnappers, and dozens of characters, many of whom get to narrate. Deeply satisfying, and highly recommended.

“Howl’s Moving Castle” (2004)

November 10th, 2012

howls-moving-castle

I believe I saw Hayao Miyazaki’s animated Howl’s Moving Castle right after I re-read the excellent book by Diana Wynne Jones it was based on. I was disappointed that one of my favorite directors and one of my favorite books by one of my favorite authors had not yielded a trifecta, but rather a mess.

I decided to give Howl’s Moving Castle the movie another chance and we watched it for family movie night this week. In it, a plain girl named Sophie meets a handsome wizard (voiced fetchingly by Christian Bale in the US adaptation). A jealous witch’s curse plunges her into old age, and she goes to work for the notorious wizard, Howl, who is rumored to feast on young women’s souls. In a turn of events everyone can predict, the nameless handsome wizard from the beginning is Howl. Instead of finding him terrifying, Sophie slowly learns that he’s vain, cowardly and selfish. But her influence on him, as well as the backdrop of a war, pushes him to transform, literally and figuratively, over the course of the movie.

The film makes little sense. Who is waging war for what reason, and why Howl is afraid of his old magic tutor are never made clear. But to my delighted boys, (and my husband and me) it didn’t much matter. Sophie is an engaging resourceful heroine, the moving castle is an animated wonder to behold, Billy Crystal is delightful as the cheeky fire demon Calcifer and if these weren’t enough, there’s a besotted turnip-headed scarecrow, a wheezy dog, and Lauren Bacall voicing a sometimes evil witch. Plot, schmot, this was lovely to look at and fun to watch. Just don’t watch it too close in time after you’ve read the book, so that it can stand on its own as entertainment, and not suffer by comparison to its source material.

2 Family Movies and a MISTAKE

November 8th, 2012

Last weekend we squeezed (squoze?) in two family movies. At home we watched Harry Potter 2 The Chamber of Secrets (the one with the basilisk, the diary and Dobby), with Kenneth Branagh’s brilliant turn as the vain, cowardly Gilderoy Lockhart. 6yo Guppy pumped his fist at the first quidditch scene. So far he and 9yo Drake are handling the images well, so I’m going to continue on to #3, which was my favorite of the films.

Then we went to to see Brave so I could write about the inexpensive but awesome theater where it was showing. Both boys gave Brave a good review, though we had an unfortunate ending when G. had to rush Guppy to the rest room at the end when he complained of feeling ill. Warm theater + too many Skittles was too much for him, so he missed the very end, but didn’t seem that bothered by it. And didn’t actually barf, so all was well that ended well.

With two good movies under my belt, I was feeling cocky. A recent reunion issue of Entertainment Weekly had reminded me of John Hughes’ Some Kind of Wonderful, which I owned but hadn’t re-watched. Rather than obsessing over election results on Tuesday, I decided to watch what I thought would be a cheering, diverting movie. Alas, it was terrible–a lame retread of Pretty in Pink with a pretty Eric Stoltz pining for prettier Lea Thompson while cute-as-a-button Mary Stuart Masterson squirms. I did learn from the EW article that Thompson married the director, (Hughes just wrote and produced) and that they’re still married. That piece of trivia, though, does not merit a recommendation. This, like Weird Science, does not hold up.

Bleak House readalong

November 8th, 2012

A reminder that my friend Amy is heading up a readalong of Dickens’ Bleak House at New Century Reading, and has a very reasonable schedule that follows the original serial release of the book. This next Monday is only the 3rd week, where we’ll be discussing up to chapter 10 (p. 144 in my edition), so you can still catch up if you want.

I highly recommend this. So far I’m loving the prose, the umpteen characters and their descriptions, and the mysteries and romances that are brewing. This is rich, heady stuff, and I’m glad to be reading with others, and doing it a little at a time.

Staying Put

November 8th, 2012

This past September I passed a couple of personal milestones. My husband, I, and 9yo Drake have lived in our current house for 8 years. I believe this is the longest time I’ve ever lived in one residence. My previous record was a house in a far-flung suburb of Columbus, Ohio. We moved there when I was 10 and I left for college at 18. I came back the following summer, but my parents and I clashed over my very bad behavior, so I began my sojourn on the East Coast, almost 11 years in DC and Philly. I lived in, at my best guess, a dozen different places during those 11 years. My husband and I got married and moved to MN when he got a job here. We rented in a close suburb for 3 years, bought a condo downtown (which was great until we had a baby, then it sucked) and then (finally I hope) bought a house in a family-friendly neighborhood in Minneapolis where we’ve been ever since.

As best I can figure, I lived non-consecutively in OH for about 13 years, and consecutively on the east coast for 11 years, and consecutively in one Ohio house for slightly less than 8. Other than that long stretch from when I was 10 to 18, I never lived in any one apartment/space longer than 3 years. I’ve now been in Minnesota for 14 years, and in the same house for over 8.

About five years ago (when we’d lived in the house just over 3 years), I became very anxious about the accumulation of stuff and where to put it, and bewailed my lack of organizational skill. I even made a category on the blog for Organization. (It has very few entries.) Then I realized–prior to that point, I moved so often that my life had purging built into it, and I was feeling anxious at about the time–3 years–that I usually moved. Now that I was and would be in one place, I no longer had the urgent excuse to purge that moving provided.

I wish I could say that realization made me shape up and get organized. It hasn’t. My house is filled with blowing and drifting piles of crap. Now that 6yo Guppy is in 1st grade we have the avalanche of school papers from 2 kids, and I am fast losing my ability to know what pile something’s in. I spent half a day last week looking for a particular piece of paper. I am and probably always will be a sporadic perfectionist (occasional compulsive?) which means I make dents now and again, but then entropy takes over, piles grow and the cycle starts all over again. I probably should figure this organization thing out, though, since our house is small and I’m eventually going to run out of room.

It’s odd seeing how other people live, those who stay put and put down roots. I have no intention of moving, but life sometimes decides otherwise. I’ll have to wait and see if my plans and the future align.

“The Tragedy of Arthur” by Arthur Phillips

November 3rd, 2012

Are you sitting down? Because The Tragedy of Arthur by author Arthur Phillips, is a little complicated. It’s a novel, but one that deliberately blurs the line of reality, being narrated by the character of Arthur Phillips, an author of such books as Prague and The Song is You, just like the real life Arthur Phillips.

The novel begins with a preface:

Random House is proud to present this first modern edition of The Tragedy of Arthur by William Shakespeare.

And further suggests

that general readers plunge directly into the play, allowing Shakespeare to speak for himself, at least at first. then, if some background is helpful, look to this very personal Introduction.

Before I began the book, I knew it had to do with a play within a novel and that it was convoluted and intertwined. OK, I thought, after I read the “Preface,” what to do now? Treat it as a novel, and read the “Introduction” of 256 pages, or do what I normally do when approaching a play or classic, read the work first, then backtrack to the introduction to avoid spoilers?

I tried the play first, then a friend told me to have some sense already and just read the novel. Having attempted both, I can attest that reading the “Introduction” first is the way to go.

Arthur Phillips, the narrator and main character (and possibly also the author?) launches into a long family history interspersed with token summaries of the play that follows, purported to be a previously undiscovered work by Shakespeare. As we learn over the course of the tormented, self-aware, memoir-ish “Introduction”, the play–The Tragedy of Arthur, about King Arthur’s short reign–may have been forged by his father, also named Arthur. Got it?

Phillips’ clever novel features many recurring features from Shakespeare: boy/girl twins, a “dark” lady, crossed love, a meddling father, and a remarried mother. Some scenes are laugh-out-loud funny, while others are cringe inducing. The character Arthur tries to negotiate a relationship with his father, Arthur, and their relationship ends up bound with a play about Arthur, as well. The whole can be described by a sentence it contains referring to a project of Arthur’s twin, Dana:

Her complete project was a strange and beautiful hybrid of historical research, literary interpretation, parody, and outright fiction.

And there are numerous points in the fictional play where readers are told they’re being duped:

Gloucester: Deception ‘pon deception preys and fats
Itself, the stronger to deceive anew. (II, vii, 14-15)

The novel The Tragedy of Arthur, about a play called The Tragedy of Arthur, is a good story as well as a well-researched and intricate literary tale. As it’s set in Minneapolis and Minnesota, I recognized many places. But imagine my surprise when I recognized the husband of a former co-worker! It would be hard work, and kind of fun-defeating (and thus perfectly in sync with the novel) to puzzle out how much of Phillips’ novel is all true, how much is pretty-all true, and and how much he made up out of full cloth, as he did (I assume…) with the entire Shakespeare-esque Tragedy of Arthur that follows the “Introduction.”

A few thoughts, out of joint: the character of Arthur’s twin, Dana, reminded me strongly of Cassie from the Tana French novels In the Woods and The Likeness and the twins’ relationship is very like that of Cassie and Rob from In the Woods. I was also reminded strongly of The Family Fang, with its wacky family of four, and brother and sister who try to puzzle out the truth from the lies of their performative parents. It also reminded me of the Thursday Next novels of Jasper Fforde, in the playful/respectful manner in which it worked with the origin material. Yet this novel, with derivation at its heart, and that reminded me of several others, continued to amaze me with its originality and wit.

There will be a video chat with the author at the 11/13 meeting of Books and Bars, which I very much look forward to.

“Bleak House” by Charles Dickens, again

November 1st, 2012

Hey, everyone, my friend Amy at New Century Reading is doing a readalong of Bleak House by Dickens, using the same chapters he did when he wrote it, so one serial section a week, which is about 50 pages or so.

I started a readalong earlier this year and didn’t love it though I did love Bleak House, and am excited to give it another go.

Serial 1 is chapters 1 through 4. We meet London:

As much mud in the streets, as if the waters had but newly retired from the face of the earth, and it would not be wonderful to meet a Megalosaurus, forty feet long or so, waddling like an elephantine lizard up Holborn Hill. Smoke lowering down from chimney-pots, making a soft black drizzle, with flecks of soot in it as big as full-grown snowflakes–gone into mourning, one might imagine, for the death of the sun.

There’s an endless court case, a mysterious orphan, a crazy old lady, a beautiful woman with a past… Oh, I look forward to finding out more!

“Nothing to Be Frightened of” by Julian Barnes

November 1st, 2012

A selection for my book group that discussed books about myth or religion, Nothing to Be Frightened of by Julian Barnes was the first non fiction pick of our almost two-year-old group. Several members had requested non-fiction, which those of you who read this blog know isn’t always my cuppa. Push comes to shove, I don’t think any non-fiction books are going into my apocalypse backpack for the end of the world.

Perhaps Apocalypse Backpack will be my band name. Anyhoo.

Since the group focuses of books of myth and religion, I’d been considering some of the new atheists like Dawkins or Hitchens. But they seemed so strident, and so “you’re dumb if you believe” that I wanted something a little more, well, moderate. And while I got that in the Barnes, which is his non-fiction meditation on death and dying from an agnostic or atheist point of view, I ended up wishing for a bit more stridency. But more on that in a bit.

I don’t believe in God, but I miss Him. That’s what I say when the question is put. I asked my brother, who has taught philosophy at Oxford, Geneva, and the Sorbonne, what he thought of such a statement, without revealing that it was my own. He replied with a single word: “Soppy.”

This paragraph is a perfect introduction to the book. It’s dryly funny, self-deprecating, and it introduces Barnes’ older brother Jonathan, a frequent sounding board in the book. Barnes relates details from historical philosophers and writers about death, and quotes friends of his. (Anyone who can identify who his friends Professor S and C are? A Guardian review made it sound as if it were obvious, but even my two most Barnesian friends didn’t know.) He relates stories from his past and from his family’s past to demonstrate the shifting nature of memory and narrative. He cops to being afraid of death and nothing (hence the pun in the title, which I appreciated) and being forgotten.

It’s well written. It’s clever. But it doesn’t tell a narrative–Barnes doesn’t finish the book in a different mind than he started it, at least in my reading. And he spirals in and out of stories and reminiscences, adding bits as he goes, which is skillfully done, yet felt repetitive. Finally, several in our group wished he’d shared more of himself, and been a little less chilly and distant, a little more strident if you will, to use the adjective from above.

And yet, thinking on this later, given the childhood and family Barnes describes in the book, I’d say that this intelligent book is about as honest and disclosing and warm (i.e. not very) as can be expected, perhaps even more.

This book was also interesting to read close in time to his novel Sense of an Ending. There is at least one character in there created from reality, and the themes of memory and death are continuations of what is here.

I found it strange that the hardcover US edition features a grim Barnes staring out at us. It’s not an inviting image. The cartoon-y grave on the trade paperback edition is cheekier, and more engaging I think. But what I wished for was the cover of the English hardover edition, which reproduces a photo discussed in the book, of a woman with her face scratched out. This, I think, is a spooky, unsettling image straight from the book that matches its tone best. (Though the English TPB edition is a close second, I think. Weird, how they obviously could not agree on one image for this book. Were four really needed?)

One final question. His book is dedicated to P, most likely his late wife, Patricia Kavanaugh who died of a brain tumor in October of 2008, while this book was published in March of that year. She is mentioned just once, in passing, in the entire book. Was Barnes aware of her tumor, and her impending death while writing this, a further example of his reluctance to actually inhabit his own exploration?

From the Archives: Five Holiday Gifts

November 1st, 2012

I remembered! I remembered to post The Five Holiday Gifts early this year!

I met a friend today who said her 4yo daughter woke up this morning, the day after Halloween, and asked if it was Christmas yet. So here, in plenty of time, which is completely uncharacteristic of me (what’s next, an on-time, good-quality holiday card?) is this article that helps me every year.

Your advice: my boys are 6.5 and 9yo. They have a bazillion stuffed animals. Advice on the gift to hug and love? And no, sister Sydney, nothing alive counts for my allergic boys and their anxious, impatient mom.

From the archives, on gift giving for kids:
Star Tribune 12/24/89 - Pat Gardner “Tender Years”

The weeks of hectic preparation are coming to a close. Within days, the magic will begin to unfold for our children and, vicariously through them, for us. Just as we remember those wonderful Christmas Eves and mornings long ago, our children will one day look back on these days. How will they remember them? What are you giving your children this year?

I know one family of modest means that makes a great effort to celebrate Christmas in the best way possible. Their children always find five gifts under the tree. And more than that, the gifts are always accompanied by a parent. Here’s how they do it.

The children always receive a gift to hug and love. Sometimes it’s a doll or maybe a stuffed animal. Every Christmas each child has something to care for, to carry along and finally at night to share a bed, secrets and dreams.

The wise parents know that the children will themselves learn to care for others by practicing on dolls and stuffed animals. Mom and Dad demonstrate rocking the stuffed bear and wiping the doll’s face. They talk about being gentle and giving care.

More important, they treat their children tenderly. They make a special effort at this busy time of year for a little more lap time, more frequent hugs and all the physical care and attention their young children need.

The children in this family always receive something to read. The parents know that to give them books is to give them wings. The little ones get books, and the big ones get books. Books aren’t foreign to any member of this family. Books are treasures. And more than that, they become a daily connection between parent and child.

The wise parents know that the best way to raise a reader is to read to a child….They share curiosity. They take the time to listen patiently to their beginning reader. They share discoveries. Through books, these parents explore worlds within their home and beyond their front door with all of their children.

The children receive toys and games. These parents are concerned about each child’s skills and find fun ways to enhance their present capabilities and encourage further development. For a grasping baby, a crib gym; for a beginning walker, a push toy; for a pre-schooler, a shape and color sorter; for a beginning reader, a game of sequence and strategy.

The parents know that play is the work of childhood. They understand that to meet a child at her level of accomplishment is to encourage success in play. Success stimulates motivation and interest in a challenge. So the parents judge their toy and game choices carefully. Not too easy, but not too hard.

They they do the most important thing. They play with their children. The children see that learning is a toy, that it’s fun to challenge oneself, that play can be a very social activity, that it’s OK to win and also to lose and that Mom and Dad wholeheartedly approve of play.

The children in this family always receive a gift of activity. From a simple ball or jump rope to a basketball hoop or a pair of ice skates, they always have one gift that encourages action.

The parents know that those children who, by nature, are very active may need to be channeled into acceptable and appropriate activities. And they know that those children who, by nature, are very passive may need to be encouraged to move with purpose. But their message to their children is that physical activity is important and good.

These parents make their message clear by joining their children in physical play. They skate and play catch. They’re on the floor with their crawlers and walk hand in hand with their toddlers. They get bumped and bruised and laugh and shout. They sled and they bowl. And many times in the next few weeks when resting on the couch sounds much more inviting, these parents will give their kids one more gift. They’ll get up and play with them.

The children always receive a gift of artistic expression. They might find crayons, paints or markers in their stockings. It might be a gift of clay this year or rubber stamps or scissors and glue. The materials change, but the object remains the same: create with joy.

These wise parents aren’t terribly concerned about the mess of finger paints. They’re more concerned about the exposure to unique sensations. They want their children to use their imaginations. They want their children to approach life in a hands-on fashion. And they want them to express themselves through their artistic activities in ways that exceed their vocabularies.

Fright Night (2011)

October 31st, 2012

Do you ever have that feeling like your life is a purse that’s too small for all your stuff, and no matter how much you try to prune away, you just can’t fit it all in? Kinda feel like that, today.

So, didn’t want to go another day without telling you that my husband G Grod and I watched the remake of Fright Night from last year. And it was hella fun. It’s a funny/scary vampire tale written by Marti Noxon, who used to write for TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer (and whose name I always confuse with Marni Nixon, who did the actual singing for many classics like West Side Story). It has David Tennant, formerly Dr. Who, in a significant role. Colin Farrell is perfectly cast, so kudos to whoever picked him. AND I liked the 1985 original (seem to remember watching it with my sisters) and one of the stars from that has a cameo.

SO, hardly haute cinema, but if you’re a Buffy, Dr. Who or Fright Night ‘85 fan, check this one out.