Tactical Error: Feeding my Child
The pediatrician warned us, “Don’t just feed him foods he likes. Offer him what you’re eating, and if he doesn’t eat it, let him be. Don’t keep offering him things until he eats something.”
It was sound, reasonable advice. But for a long time, Drake was so thin that it didn’t feel right to let him escape from a meal without eating. Now that he’s put a little weight on, though, we have–Surprise!–a toddler with bad eating habits. His diet consists mostly of yogurt, toast, hot dogs, and mac and cheese. He never will eat what we eat for dinner. If it’s all we offer, he starts shouting “Down!” with increasingly volume and frequency until either we let him down, or we offer him something more to his taste.
Last night was the night we decided to make the change. We offered him what we had. He refused. We tried to get him just to try it, invoking Green Eggs and Ham, and Bread and Jam for Frances. No dice. “Down! Down! DOWN!” So we let him down without eating, and decided that offering something new should be done at lunch, which is usually his biggest meal.
I tried again at lunch today. “Just try it. If you try it I’ll let you have something else.” He wouldn’t even try it. So down he got, having had no lunch after no dinner last night and a scant breakfast this morning.
A firm change is best. I know–in theory at least–that he won’t starve, and he’ll eat when he’s hungry. I must not cave before that happens.
January 12th, 2006 at 2:34 pm
Sounds like you’ve been watching Nanny 911 again. Good for you! I told you you’d love that Tivo.
Isn’t it amazing (& sad) how some of those parents function?!
January 12th, 2006 at 4:10 pm
Kirk, I’ve never watched either Nanny 911 or Supernanny. Scuttlebutt in the mommy circles is that Supernanny is the better of the two, though. Any feeding initiatives must be part of a parenting zeitgeist.
You’re a bachelor, world traveller and bass player. What are you doing watching Nanny 911?
January 13th, 2006 at 11:03 am
Me? Watching Nanny 911?
I don’t know what you’re talking about.
June 29th, 2006 at 7:45 pm
I don’t know whether you will ever read this comment or not, but I just have to say: please, stick to your guns. I realise you started this before the guppie was born and that was wise.
We did not persevere with either of our children (they’re lean skinny types like Drake) and they are now 8 and 5.75. They won’t eat potatoes, rice or corn off the cob. They hate sauces (including BBQ) on their meat. I could go on and on….but the point isn’t what they won’t (or will) eat.
The point is: I’ve allowed them to become so fussy and demanding that I am completely demoralised when it comes time to cook dinner. I used to love to cook: my dh loved to eat it. Now every single meal (and I mean every single one…even snacks) is a struggle, a fight, an argument, and at best a negotiation.
(sigh).
Good luck.