This is My Life
Example umpteen gazillion for those mothers who coo about motherhood.
This morning, as part of our potty-learning program, 2.5yo Guppy deposited the contents of his diaper in the toilet. I told him to flush. He coughed, a marble flew out of his mouth and into the toilet. I was momentarily speechless.
“Get it out!” I reprimand. No dummy, he shakes his head. I direct my fierce, frowning-mommy face at him. “How do you think I feel about that marble being in your mouth, and in the toilet?”
“I don’ know,” he says looking down with a coy smile to accompany the disingenuous upspeak of his sentence.
“ANG-REE!” 5yo Drake calls from the hall, keeping his distance. Also happy that, this time, he’s not on the receiving end of my glare of displeasure.
I wonder. Will the marble hurt the plumbing? Don’t know. Do we have marbles to spare? No, because they keep disappearing. I assumed they were under the couch, but maybe they’re in Guppy’s belly.
I take a deep breath, reach in, stifle a shudder of revulsion, then grab the marble and hustle it and my hands to a thorough washing with lots of soap and hot water.
I’m off to hide the rest of the marbles.
November 6th, 2008 at 11:22 pm
For what it’s worth, I don’t think their marbles would do anything to the plumbing. (They demo toilets by sending golf balls down them!)
I’m sure it wouldn’t teach them a lesson to let the marbles vanish down the toilet, even though that is my first thought. They’d probably try to see what else they could flush, a la Bart Simpson.
November 10th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
If I ever coo about motherhood, you know what to do.