Girl Detective

I don’t have much time to devote to last night’s show, “On Garde.” There were a few surprises, one of them the designer who was auf’d. Also, how is Ricky’s teflon butt escaping being kicked out each week? Mostly, though I’m left with the question of whether Jillian and Victorya have one emotion, between them? They’re not women, they’re FEMBOTS! The only time I saw V. look animated was when Team Fierce won, and it was almost as if her processor told her, “You are human, yet must be a good loser. Look happy when others win.”

Why did she look happy then, and as if she were sucking lemons the whole rest of the time? And why did the design seem so much of J, and so little of V?

Oh, how I wish I’d been on the couch chez Project Rungay.

OK, I’m in for The Sarah Connor Chronicles. Lena Headey is Sarah, filling the huge shoes of Linda Hamilton from Terminator 2. She seems a little too pretty and fine boned for the part, but I heard no trace of her English accent, and she did a more-than-capable job–believable and likable right away. The music was straight out of Battlestar Galactica. Thomas Dekker as John is a little more of a problem. Not necessarily the actor, but his meek, mother-smothered character. Do I really believe that this is the kid that the delinquent of T2 turned into? Not sure.

According to the press, the show takes place after T1 and T2, and T3 is largely ignored. Like many a dodgy sequel, T3 isn’t factored into continuity. The premiere of T:TSCC was a huge hit, though it’s not like it had any significant competition, given the strike. The pilot was a good, solid show. Entertaining, and a decent segue from T2 to TV.

I hope that Dean Winters as her former boyfriend sticks around. He was entertaining on both Rescue Me and 30 Rock as Dennis, the Pager King. But he’s not listed in the cast on imdb, so either I’m mistaken that it was him, or he’s certainly not sticking around.

PBS’s Masterpiece presents Sundays with Jane during the first four months of 2008. Small screen adaptations (some new, some previous) air each Sunday, with subsequent reruns throughout the week.

January 13, 2008 (and this week): Persuasion
January 20, 2008: Northanger Abbey
January 27, 2008: Mansfield Park
February 3, 2008: Miss Austen Regrets
February 10, 17, and 24: Pride and Prejudice (1995, with Colin Firth as Darcy)
March 23, 2008: Emma (1996 with Kate Beckinsale in the title role)
March 30, April 6, 2008: Sense and Sensibility

Consider reading all the novels. I finally did so last year, and enjoyed them a good deal.

The author of Velcrometer, M Giant’s birthday is this Friday, the 18th of January. He knows what he wants:

Pre-order my book. No, not yet!

My birthday is Friday, January 18th. On that day, let’s say in the afternoon, I would love it if as many people as possible would go to Amazon and preorder my book, A TV Guide to Life. You may think this is a poorly veiled ploy to artificially inflate my Amazon ranking for a brief moment. Nothing could be further from the truth. It is in fact a bare-ass naked ploy. You want in?

I’m thinking 3:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. Central Time will be the ideal window. I’d love to just say 3:00 p.m. straight up, but I don’t know how many of you have Amazon blocked on your work computers.

M. is a funny, fine writer, and a good guy to boot. Consider buying his book this Friday.

SPOILERS AHEAD!

I loved this week’s challenge–to work with a high-school girl and design her prom dress. Christian’s snippy comment that prom was awful and tacky and horrible made me laugh out loud. It’s both true, and yet so snobby of him. Then to see him and many of the others in their prom photos? Priceless.

Christian also nailed it when he said that it was a ridiculously hard challenge–make a dress, please the client, make it representative of him as a designer, plus make it age and event appropriate. Seeing him struggle, both with his demanding client and with the dress itself, endeared him to me, finally, as did his many attempts to hold back tears. His youthful bravado took a big hit this week.

I suspected Ricky would be the one to go when they did the bit with him on the phone to his mother, and how poor they were when he was growing up. He was delightfully self-deprecating when he noted that he’d made his date’s prom dress in high school. Chris played it safe, I thought. Rami may be a one-trick draping pony. Jillian’s effort was surprisingly uninspired, given her general excellence at girly designs. Sweet P’s was great; I wanted her to win simply because she’d so much more likeable then the weirdly animatronic Victorya. Victorya was vindicated from finding out she was the last one chosen with her deserved win. It was a good dress, in a striking color with good detail.

Ricky got off easy, and Christian had to sweat, but it was Kevin who went home, and deservedly so. Ugly color, ugly dress, sloppy execution. So no more of him protesting too much his straightness. I’m glad Christian is in, and hope he learns some humility along the way.

They guys at Project Rungay disagree with me; they think Kevin was unfairly auf’d and that Victorya unfairly won. And I can see their points–Kit’s awesome dress never even got mentioned, and Ricky’s was worse than Kevin’s, and Ricky’s been doing consistently low level stuff. But there it is. Life’s not fair, certainly in fashion.

I’m beginning to suspect that Project Runway has indeed jumped the shark. I’ve recently watched Season 1 and most of Season 2. They feel so much more compelling than the season 4 group. Perhaps there are still so many designers that it’s hard to separate any from the pack. The Eye Candy challenge seemed fun, though contrived. More contrived than season 2’s plants and season 3’s recycling? Probably not. Elisa and Sweet P both deserved the boot. It had to be Elisa, though, because as soon as someone makes a statement like, “I wanted to be here so I could prove myself after that horrible car accident that cracked my head wide open,” well, that’s tempting fate. Christian’s arrogance and haircut are both ridiculous. Perhaps he’ll end up as the deluded crazy of the season. Is it just me, or do best buds Rami and Jillian seem far too talented and reasonable to be much fun? I did think Jillian deserved the win for doing something more difficult and using the Twizzlers. Oh, and I loved her comment that her model smelled good, too.

Tim Gunn’s blog entry about the ep is good, and check out Project Rungay, where they have fewer nice things to say about Jillian’s Twizzler dress.

Last night’s “What’s the Skinny?” was a great challenge, I thought. The “models” are all women who have lost a lot of weight; take their former favorite garment and make something new and chic for them to wear. In the meantime, add a splash of drama when poor Jack gets sick and has to quit to seek medical treatment. This seems awfully harsh–couldn’t PR spring to bring a doc in for him? And to up the contrivance, last week’s eliminee, Chris March is brought back on short notice, just so he can round out the losing trio on the runway. Unkind, but not as unkind as some of the things the judges said in front of the women. “50’s Paris hooker, totally.” Oh, Michael Kors, you are the king of the cutting phrase, but you were referring to this women’s former favorite outfit. Ouch! “Like a french maid, going to a funeral.” That comment, though, on loser Steven’s design, was deserved by him, and vindicated the poor woman whose wedding dress he snubbed. Nina correctly called him on the carpet for the huge opportunity he missed. Again, as I noted last week, Steve’s snark seemed much more honed than his design skills, and he deserved to be off. Now if only one of the other, better, nicer designers would take a crack at the wedding dress, we could all have a happy ending.

In my opinion, Jillian should have been chided, not lauded for not using her raw material. I thought both Rami’s and Ricky’s outfits were better within the confines of the challenge.

I am fervently wishing for fewer tears. Since Jack is ostensibly gone, and I think Ricky is likely to go soon, perhaps things will dry up in the next few weeks.

I have a few observations after watching the December 6 episode of Top Chef’s holiday special this year. CJ is really funny and charming. Sandee seems great, but I suspect her early elimination from Season 3 was no accident. Marcel is so weaselly and strangely bearded that he looks like a Marvel comics villain to me. Tiffany is a force of nature, and it was fun to watch her cook. I want to try to make that butterscotch pudding. Finally, I was glad to see Tre cook well, and he lost with aplomb. His comment that coming in second to such a talented chef is a huge honor showed a lot of class, I thought. Best wishes to Tre, Tiffany, and the rest of the chefs.

Has Project Runway jumped the shark? I am excited to watch the new episode each week, then feel “meh” once it’s done. It’s gotten easier to tell who will be at the top and bottom simply based on the talking heads. For whatever reason, though, season 4 isn’t working for me.

This week’s challenge was for each designer to take an outdated trend, then group together into threes and update the trends to form a cohesive trio. The challenge was both difficult and complex, and made we wonder if PR has already peaked; it feels like they’re working awfully hard to come up with something “new”.

Since there are still so many designers, it feels more like a whirl of personalities. Christian had a pissy, immature expression when Jillian’s team was named the winner. Jack’s features are ostensibly handsome, but strangely off-putting; I sense some plastic surgery. Ricky is right; Victoria _is_ passive agressive. Is Ricky talented? It will be interesting to see. Steven’s snark is sharper than are his designs. I felt joy for Sweet P when Donna Karan singled her out for praise. And Chris’s jacket was ugly and costume-y, in spite of his delusional love for it.

Jillian, Rami, and Kevin turned out to be the dream team, though Kevin was only able to pull off those shorts at the last minute. I liked the “agree to disagree” discussion between Rami and Jillian about Kevin, and appreciated that they came across as quietly talented. Team Christian, on the other hand, was a lot of sound and fury that signified little.

I’ll keep watching of course, but I’m more compelled by the reruns of Season 2 on my Tivo than the brand new episodes.

OMG! Jack and my favorite Big Gay Chef Dale are dating! I may have to be nicer about Jack.

Remember to check out what others are saying: Project Rungay, Blogging Project Runway.

I watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer with my 4yo son Drake yesterday. I’ll stop sometimes and ask him what’s happening. “I don’t know!” he says happily.

The story of how a band of misfits come together and find strength in their unique selves is a timeless one. But a few snarky comments floated through my head, as I watched through adult eyes:

Hermie the dentist: if you substitute “gay” for dentistry, it still holds together. I’ve recently watched Season One of Project Runway. Hermie reminded me a lot of Austin Scarlett.

What women are up for, part I: When Rudolph runs away, his dad, Donner, says he’s going to look for him. Mom offers to go, too, but Donner declares, “This is MAN’s work!” Then Rudolph’s mother and girlfriend go off to look for him anyway.

Curious timing: Over a year, Rudolph leisurely grows up on his own, then returns home to find everyone is still gone, looking for him. He proceeds directly to the lair of the Abominable Snowman, who is just about to eat his parents and girlfriend. Why don’t the kids see how contrived this is?

Dental work without consent: Hermie and Yukon’s plan is to pull all the Bumble’s teeth while he’s unconscious? Animal cruelty!

What women need, part II: After they escape the Bumble’s lair, the deer return to Christmastown immediately; the males decide “that’s what would be best for the ladies.”

From the Manolo, who cried foul on the challenge:

Menswear does not fall under the purview of the fashion designer. It belongs properly and only to the tailor, to men who have devoted their lives to the arcana of button holes and pick-stitched lapels and French facings, and who know that what matters most in menswear is material, cut, fit and detail.

But had a hilarious analysis of why Tiki Barber is fashionable:

Left to his own devices, [Barber's] ebullient personality would riot in color and flash, but restrain and encase that magnificent athlete’s body in traditional English-cut suiting, and then allow him to pick the colors and the accessories, and he becomes the epitome of style. Undoubtedly it is his beautiful but stern-seeming wife who is the genius behind the suits, and it is this tension between exuberance and restraint that makes Tiki what he is fashion-wise.

Project Rungay agrees with my LCD complaint:

By its very nature, the Today Show is meant to appeal to the broadest possible demographic, which means the people who populate these shows tend toward bland personalities in bland clothing. To ask the designers to design something to be worn by such a person is basically handing them an assignment that says “Boil it down to the lowest common denominator you can.”

Maureen Ryan wondered:

Where was the love for Steven’s outfit? I thought it was very polished and smart, especially given the time constraints. He’s one to watch, and I’m not just saying that because he’s a Chicago guy.

Steven also received a lot of love in the comments on the PR4.3 post at ALoTT5MA.

Both episodes 2 and 3 had special guests, but only ep 2’s caused the designers to weep with joy and quake with fear. Christian and Carmen’s 80’s flashback was horrible, and Christian’s love of it was quite bizarre. Listen to Tim, little boy. I could hardly believe that not only did bizarre and wifty puppet-mistress Elisa stay in, but she nearly won. Victorya’s dress was good, but I didn’t see it being as universal as the judges claimed. It’s a tough challenge to design something for a low-priced everywoman line, but yet still push the fashion envelope. While I liked the pretty dress by Jack, it wasn’t astonishing.

In episode 3, most people bite off more than they can chew, and Carmen and Ricky have meltdowns when confronted with their shoddy work. Jack’s conservative two-piece wins over Kit’s more ambitious ensemble. The trouble with having a guest judge, especially one who will wear the outfit, is they’re usually not as fashion-forward as they think they are–think back to Wendy Pepper’s critical win, and Austin’s auf, in the penultimate Grammy challenge from Season 1. Jack’s outfit looked very Thomas Pink to me. Nice, but not surprising, as Kit’s fleece blazer was.

There is an element of unreality to season 3 to me; it doesn’t feel like it’s really starting. Perhaps it’s because there are still SO many designers.

Also, Kevin? You doth protest your straightness too much. Get over yourself.

Go get more PR love at Blogging Project Runway.

For them to think about while they’re on strike (go writers!):

Please, please, please don’t make Sweets be Gormogon. He’s a great, funny, recurring character, and it would be a shame to lose him.

Bones is on hiatus till the new year, but if you haven’t been watching, catch a rerun or two. The banter, chemistry, and writing have fairly crackled this fall.

For those who have been watching, did anyone else wonder if David Boreanaz had Buffy flashbacks during last week’s graveyard scene?

Top Chef info, from Maureen Ryan’s The Watcher:

A “Top Chef” cooking special, which will reunite competitors from various seasons, will air Dec. 6 on Bravo. For all you “Chef”-heads, here’s the lineup, direct from Bravo’s Tuesday press release: “Season 1’s Stephen Asprinio and Tiffani Faison, Season 2’s Betty Fraser, Marcel Vigneron and Josie Smith-Malave and Season 3’s Chris ‘C.J.’ Jacobson, ‘Tre’ Wilcox and Sandee Birdsong.”

Also launching December 6 is Bravo’s new mobile game “Top Chef Challenge.” Designed and developed by leading mobile publisher LimeLife, Inc., the game is set behind-the-scenes of a Tom Colicchio fictional restaurant. Players customize their character and enter the game’s virtual kitchen as an entry-level dishwasher and can advance to “Top Chef,” gain 5-star status and fame along the way with commentary and advice from show host, Padma Lakshmi. A series of mini-games and culinary challenges test reflexes, memory and patience to prove you have what it takes to be the next “Top Chef.” As an added bonus, the Trivia Challenge mini-game lets players demonstrate their culinary knowledge to earn extra points. Top Chef Challenge will be available for a one-time download charge of $6.99 or $2.99 monthly subscription fee (where available) at major U.S. carriers. Consumers should check with their carrier for handset compatibility.

I am sad that my big, gay, chef Dale from Season 3 isn’t participating. I hope he’s off being wildly successful somewhere.

I am helpless to resist the powerful tractor beam of Tim Gunn’s charm and fashion sense. I don’t even really like his show, and at the end I feel guilty for having watched it, but there’s something about Gunn that manages to transcend my gripes.

Some of the fashion advice is useful, some of it’s not so. One of the moments in their makeovers that’s meant to shock is when sidekick Veronica Webb insists on going through the makeover-ee’s underwear drawer. This is played for awkwardness, but there’s sound reasoning behind it. In this week’s episode, Webb surprised contestant Elena when she announced that bras were only meant to last six months.

I got some flak when I wrote about this once, but a former bra-fitter assured me it’s true. If you machine wash them, hooked and in a lingerie bag, they will stay supportive and fitting for about 6 months. Hand washing will extend this to about a year. Wearing old, stretched-out bras isn’t comfortable, and isn’t flattering. They’re not called foundations for nothing.

Now, don’t let this imply that I take my own advice. Most of what’s in my drawer is way older than six months, and those that aren’t don’t fit really well–I fall between band sizes, and my size is tough to find. I’m not sure I can really condone going bra shopping (and spending) every six months. Or the mock seriousness of Tim and Veronica Webb when they insist on examining the unmentionables. But I can’t argue that it’s a good ideal.

Oh, Manolo the Shoe Blogger, you make me laugh:

sweet and gentle Simone, you had the banging eyebrows, but your dress sucked.

Adam’s PR assessment is good, but the comments are the thing at ALLoTT5MA

The fabulous Blogging Project Runway babes

And, of course, Bravo’s own Project Runway page

But, hello?, where’s the love at Everybody Loves Saturday Night?

Oh, how I’ve missed Project Runway. Not enough so I enjoyed the lame, awkward “introducing the new designer” snippets that Bravo has been running. But in a way perfectly captured by the classy Tim Gunn commercial that announced the new season: “Finally.”

Once again, we have fifteen designers competing for a big-ass prize. This season, though, the group of designers are the most talented ever, according to every mention of Season 4 anywhere. And it certainly sounded like it from the designer bios. Many owned their own stores or had done lines before. Also, more are nearer 40 than 20, which is a definite departure from seasons past. These aren’t amateurs, they’re more like semi and actual pros.

Spoilers ahead:

The first challenge was easy compared to what past contestants have had. The designers were given tents full of fabulous fabrics and told simply to make something that showed their individual designing selves.

The claws came out in the creative process, as people scrambled to snatch choice fabrics, and later as they looked around at each others’ work. Assymetrical haircut young diva Christian was one of the bitchiest of the bunch, though his second place finish hints that he’s not to be underestimated, even at the tender age of 21. But the win went to Rami, an Israeli who can work wonders draping silk georgette. Michael Kors did get his jab in, though, with his comment about the shoulder flower looking very MOB, i.e., Mother-of-the-Bride.

The two bottom spots were ably filled. Elisa’s bizarre fabric train was supposed to look like a fountain. Instead, it caused her model to trip; Heidi Klum said it looked like the model was pooping fabric. Simone’s dress had been hastily finished. While she talked a good game about mixing feminine styles and eras, the result was a clash, not a complement.

The lesson for the week was to listen to Tim Gunn. He’d told Elisa to clean up the train, and warned Simone that she had too much finishing to do. If either had heeded his advice, they might not have been called on the carpet.

I think it’s probably best not to know what might have been. I liked Lionel Shriver’s Post-Birthday World, which explored the idea very well. But seeing Rob Thomas’s mock-ups for Veronica Season 4 makes me more sad than filled with geek joy.

Pilot part 1
Pilot part 2

(Links from Everybody Loves Saturday Night.)

But hope for the fans continues. DC Comics may pick up the series as a comic book, as Dark Horse has done with Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which has been a success.

Entertainment Weekly recommends five new shows to watch this season: Reaper, Dirty Sexy Money, Back to You, Bionic Woman and Aliens in America.

I agree about Reaper. Critics who loved the Kevin Smith pilot have been griping that it’s the same thing over and over. Each week, though, a little bit more is revealed, and I think there’s a lot to explore. (Wild guess: Andi’s dad will be a demon of the week, either during sweeps or in the season finale.)

I also agree about Dirty Sexy Money. I was skeptical at first, and didn’t think they could handle the wild changes in tone required for the soapy dramedy. But the past few episodes have shown a remarkable ability to handle the wide range of situations. Peter Krause is amused and exasperated by the Darlings while still trying to stay grounded and find out who killed his dad. The episode where Jeremy and Tripp fight, and Brian’s illegitimate son owns up to the wife, was filled with really good, emotionally authentic dialogue. One problem I have is Samaire Armstrong. Does she have a swollen tongue, or a speech impediment? Why does she speak so strangely? (Wild guesses: Nick’s half sib is either Karen or Brian, not the twins as was hinted last week. Also, Nick’s dad isn’t dead; no body was found.)

I can’t speak about Back to You. I haven’t watched it. But I haven’t even been tempted. “Old-style sitcom” is not a winning recommendation, to me.

I gave Bionic Woman three weeks. I found it badly written with a disappointing actor in the lead.

I watched Aliens in America exactly twice. The pilot was good, but the next episode I watched didn’t make me laugh in the first laugh. I think it’s being pushed by critics more for its acceptance message than for its funniness as a comedy.

Instead of the last three, I like Life, as I’ve written before. There’s a strong lead actor, and an interesting mystery as backstory, of why he was set up for a multiple murder and served twelve years of a life sentence.

A month into the new season, and here’s how things stand in our house:

Mondays: How I Met Your Mother and Heroes
Tuesdays: Bones, House and Reaper
Wednesdays: Life, and Dirty Sexy Money
Thursdays: 30 Rock and The Office

The 30-minute comedies aren’t consistently funny. The Office especially suffered from the hour-long gimmick. But all three have enough gems to make me laugh out loud several times, and that’s good enough for me.

There’s lots of non-love for the new season of Heroes. My trick is to fast forward through the story lines that irritate or bore me–Maya for the first few eps, then New Orleans for the last few. I am bothered by the fake Irish and New Orleans accents. Parkman is more of a Power Tool than ever. Wait, why am I watching, again? Oh, that’s right. I like HRG and Claire, I hope to see her new boyfriend turn out to be evil, Kristen Bell is the new naughty hot girl tracker for the company, and…well, we’ll see.

I can’t believe I was ready to drop Bones. It’s like the studio gave the writers unlimited Red Bull or something. The characters and the dialogue are often hilarious. I’m enjoying the twist of House’s new staff, and the reality-show vibe of it.

Reaper was irking me after a strong pilot by merely doing the same thing over and over. But a few reveals in the last two episodes–Sam getting his contract from the devil, and Sam’s dad behaving badly–bode well for the future plots and character development, as noted by the Onion AV Club.

Last night’s Life had some terrible lines and a lame mystery (why does this happen right after a recommend a show?), but the backstory of his history was good. I haven’t watched DS$ yet, so more on that later.